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[So this...whatever they had going on, it's complicated. That's what Wally tells himself when their teammates give he and Robin weird looks, when Batman seems like he's glaring even though Wally can't tell the difference between a stare and a glare from old Bats, when his uncle's hand rests on his back and Wally thinks they just have to know.

But he's not ashamed. He's just- he doesn't know how to explain it yet. Parents first. Everyone else second.

They finally got the okay for Robin to spend the night at Wally's, which is a rare occurrence indeed. Unfortunately, Wally's parents aren't home so it's become very awkward. Usually they just hang out, do the same thing they always do with the occasional bout of discomfort but without parents? Well. Wally's not under the delusion that anything's going to happen -they haven't even kissed yet- but it's still- it's weird. It's like back in middle school when he went up to Sandy Hartford's room and he thought they were boyfriend and girlfriend, but apparently you have to clear that with the other person first.

It was. It's weird. Because now he's looking at Dick like he looked at Sandy, and his stomach is in knots like it was with Sandy, but it's different because it's more and that just makes it weirder.]

...Mom just went shopping, there's probably like...Cheetos or something downstairs.

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Nope, looks like I'd rather do that to other people. [Wally do not joke right now.]

[ Dick's face twists in a sort of grimace. ]

I'm being serious.

[Wally winces.] I know. Sorry. Habit. [He rubs a hand over his face.] Um, yeah, I am. I mean, wouldn't you?

I would. I... was. I guess I still am a little.

[ He sighs. Easier said than done, apparently, when it comes to shedding guilt. ]

What...blaming yourself? [Wally blinks and recoils a little.] For what I did? Dude, why?

I know it's illogical, but I can't help but feel like— like if I hadn't fallen, or if I'd said the right things afterwards, or... or a lot of things. [ He shrugs stiffly. ] You're upset because of something that happened to me, and I'm upset because you're upset, and it's turning into this whole— thing. We're all messed up right now, but...

... We're messed up because we're afraid, and we're afraid because we care about each other. Right?

I- yeah man, that's not even a question. I'm scared for you and me and both of us, and I guess it's just gotten worse since- y'know, the training exercise. But-

[Wally scrubs his hands through his hair.]

You're not to blame for this. I know you're gonna feel guilty anyway and it's not like, the kind of thing someone can talk themselves out of feeling but I don't blame you and I'm not- I mean I am worried about, but I worry about everybody too. I think I just don't...I know what it looks like, now, to almost lose somebody. [You.]

Edited (CORNBREAD ALERT) 2014-06-21 08:02 (UTC)

I know.

[ Dick reaches out to take hold of one of Wally's wrists, his fingers circling it firmly but gently. ]

But you caught me.

[Wally grabs back onto Robin's hand, pulls it onto his lap. He presses Robin's knuckles against this leg.]

That's actually...part of the problem.

... it is?

[ Dick squeezes his hand, baffled. ]

Not that I reached you! Not that. [Wally squeezes Dick's hand back, fidgets with their fingers. This is the hard part. Usually he saves the power talk for Barry, or for someone else with powers at least but Black Canary had pointed out to him yesterday that it was not only detrimental of him to keep things from Robin, but incredibly arrogant.

Robin is no less a hero than you, Wally.

Wally had protested.

If that's how you feel, then you need to stop thinking he won't understand. You set yourself up for failure when you do that.]

I went...so fast. It was maybe a few seconds...I-I can't really remember, it's hard to gauge time. But I've never done that before. I- Robs, I shouldn't have been able to reach you. Dick, I looked at you and I knew you were gonna die.

[ Dick doesn't really understand the physics of speedster powers beyond basic molecular acceleration. Technically, none of it should be possible. There's something working behind the scenes there, something that that maybe none of them can comprehend. Or maybe Wally's adrenaline or desperation or whatever it was had just given him a boost he'd never needed before.

Thoughtfully: ] Sometimes under stressful conditions, the human body can do more than it seems capable of. You had to go faster, so you did. You think... maybe you jumpstarted something?

I don't know. [Wally's clutching Robin's hand between his own now, and he doesn't remember doing that.] Uncle Barry doesn't know either. He said he'd gone that fast before, but he'd always meant to.

[Kid sighs through his nose, shaking his head.] It's not a big deal. I just didn't really like it all that much. [UNDERSTATEMENT.] Kinda like how I didn't like those lowlifes giving you crap, and then I just...snapped.

... I'm sorry I ran off on you last night. I just didn't know what to say.

Dude no, I wanted to run off on me. It's fine.

...I freaked everybody out. Sorry.

I'm just glad you're okay.

[ Dick leans lightly against Wally's shoulder. I'm here now. ]

Yeah.

[Wally threads their fingers together, and maybe he does it unconsciously because he's not looking at Robin when he does.]

...thanks. For coming over. I feel better knowing...y'know, you're not mad at me.

I was never mad, dude. I'm just not great at... you know.

[ He gestures vaguely with his free hand. ]

All this.

I know, it's not like you did anything to make me think that. It's just- [Wally sniffs and rubs his nose, leaning a little more heavily on Robin even if he can't look him in the eye when he admits this.] Y'know.

You're not the only one worried about letting people down.

Wally? Look, this is gonna sound, like, Nicholas Sparks level corny, but...

[ Dick squeezes Wally's hand, tilting his head and looking up at him. ]

I don't think you could ever let me down.

[Wally's quiet for a moment before he squeezes Robin's hand again.]

You're right.

That's Sparks-level corniness.

[ Dick nods, very serious. ]

It's okay if you need to gag. I would.

I'll probably throw up later. Right now I'm just gonna pretend it's not corny and say thank you. [Wally rests their intertwined hands atop his knee.] ...I'm okay. We're both okay.

But I am suspended.

[ That gets a wince out of him. Dick had guessed that might happen, it hadn't been pretty, but... ugh, the thought of being away from him on missions, on top of how bad Wally must feel... ]

Until?

In about a week, Canary's going to sit down with me again. [Which he's not looking forward to. If he's not completely honest with her, she won't give the green light to Batman to put him back on the active roster.] So. For a week, I guess.